Hug My Soul.

Hello. Hope everyone had a good weekend. I gave out free hugs in Trafalger Square which was really, really fun and put me in an exceptionally buoyant mood. No real surprises there. Hugs on masse were cool. We also met some really interesting people. Like the boy who thought that those blue pens that have four colours in them were specific to France and insisted that I must have go tmine from there. Or the hot Venezeaulan (not spelt at all correctly) guy who got us enthused abotu free hugging in the first place.

Saturday night, we went out to club in Holborn. Which was awful. We'd lined up for ages, only to get downstairs after paying £16 and realise that we'd rather just hide in the ladies loos than participate in the surrounding idiocy. Plus, I'd forgotten my glow sticks so action had to be taken. So we made Suza ask for a refund on the grounds that she was the most sober.

Abridged exchange between Suza and club manager:

Suza: Hello. We'd like to get our £16 back because we got separated from our friends and they can't get in...

Club Manager: Yeah, right. No way..

Suza:...and because we've only been here 5 minutes and someone has already offerred to sell us drugs.

[cue fake disapproving looks from all of us behind Suza]

Club Manager: Sure. No problem. I'll just go get it.

Obviously there was a bit more rigmarole to it than that, but I think it is the one and only time I haev ever attempted to get a refund from an appalling club. But for £16 cover charge I either had to:
A) Buy a tent and move there permanently;
B) Get drunk and pretend I was having a good time while secretly wishing pain upon my fellow club patrons; or
C) Get a refund by suggesting that we were the type of people who were at all surprised by the fact that there are drug dealers at clubs in London. And that we might also be the type of people who would write a letter to the authorities.

Feeling newly wealthy, we ended up heading to a cool soul bar and danced what was left of the night away. Tip to any guys reading this, if you are are going to go for the always tenuous 'smell compliment' stick to something within the flower range. For example 'you smell like tulips'. Do not suggest that a girl smells like:
- pillows (wtf?) or
- like you should already be in the shower together (eek!)
I am sure for most of you this was an unnecessary lesson. But apparently not all men have learnt it.

The evening ended, as all good evenings do, standing near Tottenham Court Road with a massive cone of frites covered in garlic sauce.

At least I was sober enough not to order a kebab.